To end 2025, I tried to catch my breath. In the process I found a piece I wrote at a writer’s conference with poet John Roedel in August of 2024 in the mountains of North Carolina. It feels right to share on the start of a new year.

The guidance was to find a spot and write for 12 minutes without stopping or editing…

Here I am. Soul open. A sponge to absorb it all. Fresh Air. Strong sun. Nature sounds. Universe in every way. Peace of night. Warmth of day. Silliness. Openness. Laughter. Openness. Longing. Openness. Pain. Openness. Desire. Openness. Pain. Openness. Next. Determination. Next. Love. Next. Success. Next. Me. Next.

SHIFT

TWIST

MOVE

I want to go forward but it all feels so vast. Am I frozen, fearful, furious, forlorn?

Tired… weary… exhausted… connected… tethered… tentative… expectant.

If I move what will be lost? What will I gain? Hope is here.

Why am I stagnant? Am I waiting? Mind full or mindful? Patient? Lost? Lonely?

Untethered.

Do I want to be grounded… what will I find or leave behind?

Clock stopped. New guidance to keep going for another 12 minutes…

Is grief opportunity, escape, avoidance… a desire for lingering connection to him and to “Him”? The veil thin. The energy big but simple.

Hopeful. Still.

Am I tired or has my frequency changed? Is my dial down low… was it even good before? Did I override or overload? Is the space needed, necessary, or a hack to avoidance?

Will my energy return? Is it really gone? Is my vibration off or just more seamlessly aligned—smooth with less resistance?

LESS RESISTANCE

My call… what sparks, what nags, what excites, what yells, what bellows, what beckons?

I am good. I am different. I am grounded in space.

INFINITY